My husband and I recently went on a cruise for our anniversary. I'll be honest; I had and have mixed feelings about it.
So here are some tips for those of you who are considering something like this.
As parents, you should take time away. It's very hard for some of us. I was okay for the first couple of days, but as time wore on (it was 6 days, 5 nights), I got to where my thoughts were caught up in what was going on at home (Were the kids okay? Was my mother, who was taking care of them, okay? And the major one: how selfish could I have been to spend time and money like this?) I got to where I couldn't wait to be shot of the boat on which I was trapped. However, time together as a couple is important for a solid, lasting relationship. Maybe, however, if you've never taken a vacation together since having kids, start with a smaller time frame than we did if you are prone to guilt and worry.
A cruise is a good way to relax without pressures. One only needs a clock to get to shows (or dinner if you choose the main dining room) and back on the boat after shore excursions. If you are smart (and I saw many who weren't), you will turn OFF your phone. First of all, getting away from technology is GOOD FOR YOU. Second, if you don't have an international plan, you can get smacked with phone charges. Most cruises have many options for leisure; everything from relaxing by the pool getting skin cancer (my husband's favorite) to rock wall climbing and other sports. You need do nothing for yourself, other than haul yourself around this floating town and eat and drink. Bars abound (I think there were about a dozen on our ship), so if you like drinking, you are all set. Our boat had a buffet three times a day (for several hours each time), packed full of food of all kinds, not to mention the main dining room, room service, and other eateries. So if you like eating, you will be in hog's heaven.
This brings me to point about money. A cruise can be a very good deal for a vacation, PROVIDED HOWEVER, you don't saddle yourself with extras. A $12/person per day gratuity is automatically charged to the credit card you are required to provide at check-in. You can tip on top of it, but don't feel obliged to do so. Coffee, tea, water, and some flavored waters are provided in the dining areas and are included, as is the food in the main dining room, the buffet, and room service, in the price of the cruise, Sodas, bottled water, and alcoholic drinks are not included. They will try to sell you a beverage package. This is only a good deal if you plan to drink more in a day than would cost you to buy individual drinks. For example, on our ship, the Premium Drink Package, which was for cocktails, beer, wine, and bottled water, cost $50/person per day. Cocktails cost anywhere from $7-12 (give or take) each. If you were to drink more than five or six a day, you might be better off with the package. If you just like to have one drink or so before dinner, you would be wise not to buy the package. Some cruises will allow you to bring two bottles of wine per stateroom, so if you think that's all you'll drink, do that.
Shore excursions can be pricey, so depending on where you go (and research it ahead of time), you might want to stick with a bit of shopping or sightseeing within easy access of your ship. With shore excursions, you will also have to be at a set place at a set time, and as you have to be back at the ship by a certain time, you will need to be careful about how long your excursion will take. With shopping, I recommend checking with your credit card company about fees and exchange rates and let them know you will be out of the country (or wherever you will be) so that your card doesn't get canceled by the security department.
A cruise is an excellent place to meet people from all over the world. That, to me, was the best part of it (besides not having any responsibilities). Our ship had approximately 1,200 staff from 62 countries. Passengers, too, are from all over the U.S. and from other countries. We met people from Romania, Ukraine, Italy, China, Indonesia, the Philippines, Guyana, St. Martin, St. Lucia, Macedonia, the U.K., and others that I don't remember. We met a Mormon (they apparently prefer to be called LDS-Latter Day Saints) couple from Utah. And, no, the husband did not have more than one wife (at a time-this was their second marriage each). It was absolutely fascinating.
As you will have several days of no kids and no work, you do have to do something with your time, even if it's just catch rays. My husband and I have very different ideas of what it means to relax, so we did a lot of things apart. I was not to hyped on the pool and laying out with crowds of people and loud music, as my husband was. I liked to find a quiet spot to read or just look at the ocean. The very forward part of the ship had a helo pad with benches where few people came. It was incredibly windy but beautiful and quiet (well, quiet meaning few people). I also wasn't into staying up all night at the lounges listening to the bands. Some were nice, such as piano music one night (He even played Floyd Cramer! Anyone besides my parents and me remember him?); the R&B band was good, but I could only take so much of late night drinking and music. I liked to curl up in bed with a good book. My point is this: talk to each other about what you expect regarding spending time together. If either of you does it all your way and drags the other one along, you won't both enjoy it. If you spend time apart, one or the other might feel slighted. Talking it through beforehand will help, though perhaps not thoroughly do away with, any resentment or bad feelings when all is done.
All in all, it was a good time. But the best was returning home. I needed a break, but I realized how great my busy life is. I don't do well at doing nothing (family trait - I got scolded by the Boss for working too much the day after we returned, when he said he would take the lead for the day), and I learned how much I love having times for work, times for play, and times for rest. I also learned I can do without my phone without withdrawal.
