Baking, decorating, and, of course, eating cookies is amazingly fun and extremely tasty. However, to make your cookie experience the best it can be, several rules should be followed.
Rule Number One: Ask Mom at any time other than a convenient time. Inconvenience is the spice that makes cookie making and eating most delicious. When she's doing chores is an excellent time to ask, but the most superior time to ask is near the end of a very busy day when she has sat down to take a few precious moments of rest and relaxation (if she's turned on a television show or is reading a book or a magazine makes it a diamond-studded time). If she says no, or even worse, that we'll do it later, the next step is vital. Make her feel like not to do so would ruin your life forever. Moms mostly feel guilt for two reasons: 1) they aren't spending good amounts of quality time with their kids, and 2) they have probably done something that hours of expensive therapy won't fix. Play it up well. Tell her you love spending time with her. Tell her that you can learn from her. Tell her that it's better than television. Tell her anything that will guilt her into making the cookies right now. If she wavers and doesn't say yes or no, discourse to her more reasons why you should. For example, remind her of how long it's been since you've made cookies, even if you just made them a day or two ago. Don't forget Manners! Manners are absolutely vital. Saying "please," "if you don't mind," or "may we" go a long way toward getting a "yes" out of Mom.
Rule Number Two: If you can at all swing it, ask to have a friend join you. Two kids are harder for a mother to handle, and thus the fun is increased in magnitude. Your chosen friend should have less experience at baking than you do. You can say you want your friend to have the same experience you have and that you can help them learn. Of course, you teach them your way and these rules. If Mom doesn't agree, save it for another time. Don't sweat it and don't give her a hard time; she might deny you the entire privilege.
Rule Number Three: Do as little of the actual baking as possible. Everyone knows that food always tastes better when someone else cooks it. Stand very near on a stool and look as interested as possible. With any luck, you'll simply get a lesson without actually doing anything. If you can't get out of helping, make sure to make as big a mess as possible. A few suggestions: Hold the measuring spoons and cups sideways. Mom will have to straighten them and will probably have a few choice words for you, but it might just get you out of having to do the work. Stir as fast as possible; cookies contain flour, which is very soft and light and will puff out in a cloud or spill out onto the counter very easily. Ask to crack open the eggs. This can be done over the counter or the floor but never over the bowl. When the batter is made, make sure to get the spoon to lick. This move is for two reasons: 1) raw cookie dough is very toothsome, and 2) you have the advantage of telling Mom that you helped her by cleaning the spoon. She'll still have to wash it, but you at least will have helped her by getting the dough off it before washing.
Rule Number Four: When the dough is ready to be rolled and cut into shapes, insist on rolling it out. Rolling cookie dough is not easy, and Mom will probably want to help you. Eventually, she'll get so frustrated with your ineptness that she'll do it herself. The same with cutting. Do it slowly and use the space you have to cut as inefficiently as possible. The more times the dough has to be rolled, the greater the chances Mom will do it for you. But be careful. You don't want to overdo this. Too much frustration on Mom's part might land you in the no-cookies-again zone. You don't want that. So you might have to make some effort to roll and cut correctly and efficiently. It's not so much fun, but you increase your chances at future fun by making a little effort at this time.
Rule Number Five: Use as much frosting and as many sprinkles as is humanly possible when it comes time to decorate the cookies. Mom may insist on frosting the cookies herself. Try to get her to let you (after all, you can sneak a few mouthfuls of frosting while you are creating your works of art), but don't put too much effort into it. Sprinkles are even more fun and less work. DO NOT under any circumstances actually sprinkle the sprinkles. Don't let the name deceive you; sprinkles are for DUMPING or POURING, not delicately sprinkling. You should have a waterfall, not a mister. If Mom is smart, she'll make you use a tray with sides to decorate your cookies. If you like to eat sprinkles in large quantities without the cookie, this is a blessing. The tray hold the sprinkles in one place when you dump them. After the decorating is done, you can then get a spoon and eat up the sprinkles. Mom wouldn't want you to waste them, of course, because waste is sinful. If you like to make a mess, the tray is your nemesis. Therefore, you must put the cookies as near to the edge as possible in order to dump sprinkles both on the cookies and the floor or table. You must use some slight of hand here; you don't want Mom to catch you dumping sprinkles on the floor.
Last but not least, Rule Number Six: Make sure you get to eat at least one during or as soon as you've finished decorating. Why go through all that work and not get instant gratification?
There. Now you have the rules for making cookies. Best of luck to you, and remember, practice makes perfect. Cookies never go out of style and are always good for filling an empty belly, so you can never have too many.
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